


Departures

by SoulOfAFangirl684



Series: GX Headcanons [5]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! GX
Genre: Brief Talk of Past Lives, Canon Compliant, Friendship, Gen, Growing Up, Light Angst, Optimism, Reunions, Self-Reflection, english names used, hints of PTSD, season 4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-15 00:19:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18487414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoulOfAFangirl684/pseuds/SoulOfAFangirl684
Summary: His friends would be all right. He knew that. But he could see the cracks this journey had left in each of them. Cracks he'd begun to notice in himself as well.





	Departures

**Author's Note:**

> You know, the longer I went on with this one… the more it felt like maybe I hadn't had a super clear idea of what I'd wanted to write for Jaden's character piece after all. (Which is kind of funny, because that's what started me out on this journey of GX one-shots.) Really, I just knew I'd been disappointed by how little season 4 addressed his fusion with Yubel. Even his new powers were left pretty vague. Honestly, this whole thing was spawned from how many scenes there are in season 4 of Jaden just… off by himself, having a quiet moment. Clearly reflecting on something. It was just so frustrating that the writers didn't even make an attempt to let us into his head during any of those moments. So here we are. I feel like this probably isn't the end… I may write something else for Jaden in the future, with a more specific topic in mind… but this was my first attempt at addressing it.

It was not exactly unheard of for Jaden Yuki to lose track of time. He didn't even own a watch and wasn't big on sticking to a schedule. Whether he was getting lost in one of his duels or wrapped up in one of the countless adventures that somehow seemed to just _find_ him, Jaden had always been one to go with the flow, let the wind take him wherever it happened to be going. But this… This was something else.

Returning to Duel Academy—to what Yubel swore was his own time (but really, weren't they _all_ his times, technically?)—was disorienting, to say the least. He'd lost track of how many lives he'd lived (relived) after fusing with Yubel. So he was thrilled to see his friends again. It felt like a million years had passed since they'd last been together. And at first, he'd seen that sentiment mirrored in all of their eyes, felt it in even their most minor gestures. But all too soon, within just a few days, they all began going about their lives like usual. Like nothing had happened. Like no time had passed at all.

In hindsight, he could pinpoint the boat sailing away—taking their three remaining transfer students back to their own schools—as the moment this change took place. The act that removed the last major evidence that anything was out of place here. That particular memory stood out in his mind as a vivid snapshot. He could still feel the sand shifting disconcertingly under his sneakers as he and his old friends stood on the beach, watching them go. He watched the easy waves, the bright smiles masking all the residual darkness left behind in their hearts. But Jaden knew it was still there. (Hell, maybe the bright smiles _were_ genuine. Maybe they were all just that glad to finally be escaping this island.)

He couldn't exactly blame them. The three had been there for the big reunion, of course, but he'd been hesitant at first about addressing them personally upon his return. He'd argued back and forth within his mind (quite literally, with Yubel insisting that _he_ wasn't the one with anything to apologize for) about it for the entirety of his first full day back… before concluding that he at least owed them that much. Besides, there was some unfinished business that he knew could not be avoided.

He started with Axel. Or, at least, he tried to. Their departure date was fast approaching—he'd made his grand return just in time, really—and they were all in the midst of packing. Axel Brodie had always seemed so in-control and put-together… Jaden had figured theirs would be the easiest… formal reconnection? Apology? Goodbye? He wasn't even sure what his full intentions here were, exactly.

But when he reached Axel's room, he found that the door had been left open, and there was not a personal possession in sight inside. He frowned… but could hear familiar voices close by and continued on down the hall.

The door to Jim's room also stood open, and Jaden found both boys inside. He could see Axel's things—all neat and orderly in their bags—lined up in one corner. His friends, clearly looking for some lost possession, both had their backs to the door, and even with Axel's expert vigilance, he realized his presence had gone unnoticed. Jaden paused a moment, reflecting. He hadn't gone to any extra effort to be quiet, but there seemed to be a lot about himself that he was rediscovering these days. Since fusing with Yubel, he'd begun noticing better eyesight, sharper hearing, and now apparently effortless stealth. He knew his movements had been smoother lately, but he hadn't really taken note of the effect that had. For a moment, he just watched them. It was only when Shirley, watching him from the bed with sharp eyes, made a little grumbling noise that Jim looked up in surprise.

"Oh," he said, causing Axel to look up as well. "Hey, Jaden."

"Uh, hey, guys…" He stepped over the threshold into the room, feeling distinctly awkward. "I… wanted to talk to you all before you left."

"Oh yeah?" Jim's tone was almost suspiciously neutral. He didn't quite meet Jaden's eyes, half turning back to what he'd been doing. But Axel had straightened up to face him fully and smiled with, not only the confidence Jaden had come to expect from him, but also an inner peace that he didn't remember being there before. Axel's words were more welcoming. "It's about time. I was starting to wonder if you were going to let us leave without saying goodbye."

A wave of shame knocked into him. Jaden did his best not to blush sheepishly and waited for it to recede again before pressing forward. "It's more than that. I… I don't really know what to say to you guys. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you. None of us would be."

"Jaden…" Jim turned back sharply, a rough—dare he say, desperate—edge to his voice. Jaden got a good look at him for the first time since his return and noticed that the bandages he'd always seen wrapped around his friend's damaged eye were gone. He had heard that Jim's eye had been restored, but apparently even magic had its limits. Jaden could just see the eye behind Jim's hair, blank and unmoving. In comparison, the way his working eye wavered and flickered from one thing to the next had an almost manic appearance. And that wasn't all. Jaden could see the way his hand trembled, and it made his heart sink. The other boy was buzzing with nerves, even in the calm stillness of his dorm room. He only seemed to settle—ever so slightly—when Shirley slipped off the bed and anchored herself to his side. Jim glanced down at her with a small smile before taking a deep breath and meeting Jaden's eyes again. "Jaden. No apologies or 'thank yous' are needed. We did what we did because our friends needed us. It's that simple. And I'd do it again."

"I couldn't say it better myself," Axel said while Jaden struggled to find an answer. "Jaden… That world was hell; there's no sugarcoating it. But it put all my training to the test, and I came out on top. We _all_ overcame the darkness. That's what needs to be remembered. There will always be other battles to be fought, but this time, we won."

Could it really be that simple? He wasn't so sure. He wasn't the naïve kid he'd been when this journey had begun. He knew that adversity did not make _everyone_ stronger…

"You guys…"

There was nothing else to say to his rueful tone. There was silence for a moment before Axel's eyes lit up. He'd spotted something on the bed and lunged forward to grab it. A second later, he proudly held up Jim's trademark hat, crushed into being nearly unrecognizable from its time spent under Shirley's weight. Jaden realized this must have been what they'd been scouring Jim's room for, and after another second of silence, they all burst into laughter.

And once started, no one seemed able to _stop_ laughing. It wasn't even that funny, really. Anyone who walked in on this scene probably would have thought them all insane. Jaden blamed the tension, personally. But it was nice. Healing. The way a reunion with his friends _should_ be. It wasn't perfect. But he knew everything was forgiven.

Before he could go, Axel slipped something into his hand. He looked down to see a small red cell phone and raised an eyebrow quizzically. His friend explained, "So I have a way to contact you if we run into any more trouble. Or, my number's already saved to your contacts in case you catch wind of something first. I'm usually pretty perceptive, though."

Jaden grinned back and pretended not to notice the way Jim had averted his eyes again. He couldn't help thinking that his friend had lightened up a bit, on top of regaining his confidence. Perhaps this experience had done someone some good after all. It made him feel a little better, knowing Jim had a support system that was a little steadier than Jim himself. Maybe they'd all be okay after all.

Now came the hard part. Jesse's room was right down the hall. They'd all been put up in the Obelisk Blue dorm for the duration of their stay on the island, and it hadn't escaped Jaden's notice that no one tried to stop him when he strolled right in the front entrance. Now, two blue-clad students sidestepped him but didn't make any snide comments or question his presence here. He'd seen the flash of recognition in their eyes, the way they'd quickly shifted their lines of sight and hurried past. He wondered, briefly, if they had been two of the crowd turned into dueling zombies during that first interdimensional trip… but ultimately figured it didn't matter. He'd seen eyes following him and his friends everywhere they went these days. Especially after his own delayed return, they'd become a legend unlikely to fade from the minds of this academy any time soon.

He kept his eyes down, passing the room that had belonged to Adrian, until at last, he stood before his best friend's door… wondering if the other boy even still wanted that distinction. He'd just taken notice of his palms sweating when he felt a sharp prodding from somewhere inside him. Yubel, if he had to guess, though his Other didn't waste any words on him this time. Jaden rubbed the spot on his abdomen with just two fingers and a fond smile. He took a deep breath and finally knocked on the door.

It opened slowly. Hesitantly, he thought. And when Jesse's bright green eyes peeked out, it wasn't with the easygoing confidence he'd come to expect from him. But he instantly relaxed a little when he saw who'd come to visit.

"Oh. Jaden." A small smile formed on his face, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. "I shoulda guessed it was you. It sounded like Jim and Axel were throwin' a party or somethin' down there. I'm glad. I haven't heard Jim laugh in a long time…"

To say Jesse looked tired would be the understatement of the century. (And Jaden felt qualified to make that assessment now.) It made his insides twist jarringly to see the other boy looking so beaten down. He decided he'd better cut straight to the point. "So… I wanted to see each of you before you left and wrap up… anything that needed to be wrapped up. But, uh, I have something for you first."

Jesse's eyes went frighteningly blank for a moment when Jaden pulled out the deck of cards. He took back his Crystal Beasts with hands shaking so badly Jaden almost wanted to reach back out to make sure they didn't all go scattering to the floor. But Jesse maintained his grip and could only stare back at Jaden with wide eyes and an open mouth.

"You were right. They made for great company. They kept me… anchored while I found myself. I'm sorry it took so long to bring them home."

Jesse finally flipped over the top card with trembling fingers, and the spirits began to wake up, sensing the familiar touch. Jaden watched Ruby Carbuncle materialize out of the card and wind herself around Jesse's shoulders like old times, chattering happily in that Ruby Carbuncle language that Jaden had never quite managed to decipher in all their time together. But this time, the message was clear. They were all happy to be home.

Finally, this seemed to break the spell on his friend. As the spirits of the other Crystal Beasts started taking shape around him, Jesse crumpled to the ground, clutching his deck tight to his chest and loosing loud, ugly sobs for the whole world to hear. Jaden froze, unsure how to help, but he didn't have long to wonder.

"Goddammit, slacker!" A familiar angry voice rang out from deeper within the room. "You've been back for _one day_ , and you've already broken Anderson!"

"Chazz?!" he exclaimed but didn't get a chance to ask any of his questions before the door was thrown open all the way and his old rival grabbed him by the front of his shirt, dragging him inside and slamming the door behind him. Jesse had scooted up against the wall so as to be out of the way but was still lost in his reunion, tears trailing unrestrained down his face, but accompanied by a smile and the occasional burst of laughter now.

The Crystal Beasts had all made their appearances by this point, and they wouldn't have even been able to see Jesse had they not been transparent. Jaden felt a fond smile settle over his face, his nerves finally settling down as well. He heard a sniff to his left and saw that Ojama Yellow had materialized as well, slumped over on Chazz's shoulder, quickly getting weepy.

"Isn't it beautiful, boss? I just love happy reunions! Would _you_ cry if _we_ were separated?"

"What? Don't be ridiculous. And stop _crying_ on me!" Chazz replied in his usual snappish way, but his words lacked some of the intended bite. "You know what? I'm out of here. I don't do sappy."

He flipped up his collar, dislodging his partner a little, and made his exit, his pride intact. (Though Jaden had definitely seen something soft in his expression as he watched Jesse reacquaint himself with his cards.) Ojama Yellow, still a teary mess, waved a soggy handkerchief at them over Chazz's shoulder as the boy strode out of the room, the door slamming behind him again.

"I had no idea you and Chazz were friends," he commented in the following stillness. "He's kind of a hard guy to get to know, but I can see it now."

Jesse chuckled a little. He was finally calming down, wiping away some of the tears with the back of one hand. He got back on his feet—his Crystal Beasts still hovering around him—and his arms were around Jaden before the other boy had a chance to process his friend coming at him. He froze for a second before hugging him back. They held that moment, Jesse answering hoarsely, "Yeah, I got to know him pretty well these past few weeks… I didn't realize he could see duel spirits too. He was kinda always just… around. It's helped."

"I'm glad," Jaden said as they pulled apart. And it was sincere. He was relieved to know his friends had been there to support each other.

"Sorry," Jesse laughed, wiping at his eyes again. Jaden just shook his head. There was nothing to apologize for. He wasn't sure how Jesse had managed to cope with the aftermath of their ordeal without his family at his side. He knew he'd been putting off this proper reunion in the fear that he'd learn he _hadn't_. But his friend was going to be okay. He was resilient and strong and, most importantly, he wasn't alone.

Jesse smiled at him, his eyes still wet, holding his deck up to his heart. And once again, Jaden felt all his words fly away. They didn't _need_ to be said.

So standing on the beach that day was a little bittersweet. His new friends would be all right. He knew that. But he could see the cracks this journey had left in each of them. Cracks he'd begun to notice in himself as well.

He hadn't known what to expect from his fusion with Yubel. As far as either of them were aware, there'd never been another connection like theirs.

At first, Yubel had been a constant presence within him. Both reassuringly familiar and almost distressingly uncomfortable. He couldn't move a muscle without feeling _their_ muscles… or rather, where their muscles _should_ be. He'd be walking down the street of one of his past lives and suddenly wonder when he'd gotten so short. He'd go to flex his wings… and remember that he didn't have them. It always threw him for a loop when he found himself thinking _as_ Yubel. Especially because Yubel never really left him. During those early days, he was living with two sets of thoughts in his mind. It guaranteed that he ended every day with a headache. By the time he lay down to sleep every night, his skin would be _humming_. Stressed from a long day of trying to be someone _else's_ skin…

He didn't really know how to explain it. But before long, Jaden took to meditating. It hadn't really been intentional. He'd gotten used to napping during his classes and was desperate for that sort of peace. …If only he could turn off the chatter in his head long enough to drift off to sleep.

So he closed his eyes and tried to just… center himself. At least Yubel was committed to working with him these days. They each did their best to quiet their thoughts, and after a while, it started to work. During that time, they finally felt like one.

Of course, it all came rushing back when he opened his eyes and sat up, but it was a start. A reassurance that maybe he could live like this after all.

He did his best to remember that breakthrough upon his return. It actually wasn't much of a struggle to find a quiet moment outside of himself these days. Everyone else had cleared out of the Red dorm, and it was set apart from all other civilization on the island to start with. His attendance in class had always been spotty. And his friends were all facing their futures. So yes. A moment 'alone' was all too easy to find these days.

So many of his afternoons were now spent on that grassy cliffside hill overlooking the sea. That inner peace came more easily now. He didn't need to count sheep or try to distract himself by mentally analyzing his deck… He knew all its combos and possibilities by heart now. More than ever in the past, his cards were an extension of himself. A literal lifeline in the hell he'd survived.

 _Jaden…_ he heard Yubel prod on one of these occasions. _We've been away for so long… Don't you want to be with your friends?_

Jaden hummed aloud. Though Yubel's side of their conversations were always completely internal, he still hadn't grown used to answering silently. Though no one was around to hear it, he tried to keep his response to a soft murmur. "It's just… complicated. A lot has happened since we were last together."

_You aren't still feeling guilty?_

"No. And you'd know if I was," he replied in an almost teasing tone. He felt something stir within him, briefly, and closed his eyes to try and feel it with more clarity… but it was already gone.

Haou's presence was almost harder to define than Yubel's honestly. He'd quickly ditched the habit of referring to him as the 'Supreme King' and had felt the stab of indignance at this slight. But these moments where Haou's presence was strong enough that Jaden could feel separate emotions or thoughts or his own ego were so few and far between that Jaden didn't really think of him as his own person. Yubel was his Other, but Haou was more like… a second side to himself. Too much a part of his original self to even make that distinction.

 _I just hate to see you isolating yourself_ , Yubel pushed softly. _You always used to hate being alone…_

"But I'm not alone," he replied with a genuine smile this time. "I'll never have to be alone ever again."

He felt the pleasure and pride that arose in Yubel from his words and took a moment to just… bask in that. Even as a secondhand echo, it was a wonderful feeling.

"We're just… not the same people we were when I left. None of us are," he continued more seriously. "Now, we're each on our own journeys, and I'm not sure I'm what they need right now. My friends are all figuring out their futures… and I'm still figuring out my past."

 _Your present_ , Yubel reminded him, almost gently.

"Right," he acknowledged, laughing a little again. "Exactly. I think I just need to focus on myself for a while before I can help anyone else."

Not to mention, spending time with him had only ever caused them trouble before.

Once again, he remembered a second too late that just because he didn't _mention_ this doubt didn't mean Yubel didn't hear it.

**…**

When he'd left to fuse with Yubel, he'd told Syrus he was leaving on a journey to become an adult. It was poignantly satisfying now to get to watch his friends bloom into adulthood as well. As their school days neared their end, they each began carving out their own paths into the vast terrain known as the future. And he really was happy for them. Proud, too. But he couldn't help feeling that after his own dramatic growth, he'd stagnated, like he was stuck in some kind of limbo.

He could barely remember the bright-eyed kid who'd first arrived on the island, confident he'd be the next King of Games. He couldn't pinpoint the exact moment that dream had been set aside, but it also didn't really matter. Perhaps what really mattered was that _he_ had changed. There was a part of him that would still love to compete in a tournament or two—just for fun. But there was no weight behind that desire anymore. He'd gotten a close-up and personal look at what was really important, and a striking sense of responsibility came attached to that understanding. He had the power to do something about the darkness when it threatened this world—and sometimes the light too.

Syrus had gotten teary-eyed for the first time in a while, relating back the moment his brother had handed down his old deck and spoke of finding new potential. Perhaps that's what he needed to do as well.

Yubel's presence as the other half of his soul no longer felt like this foreign object, prodding him sharply if he moved the wrong way. They were one being, working comfortably together. And he was ready to see what the world brought their way next.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, wow… Where to start with my thoughts to wrap up this one? Well, for one, this was originally going to be almost all self-reflection on Jaden's part, focusing on his fusion with Yubel and how that affected him. But the reunion with and departure of Jim, Axel, and Jesse was so skipped over in the canon as well, that I couldn't move on without spending at least a little time on that too. And then the focus of this one-shot just came to be about departures in general… I think I'm satisfied with this as a starting point, at least. 
> 
> Lastly, I want to leave you with a few recommendations. There were two stories in particular that stood out to me while looking for fics that addressed these topics in… well, the way I wanted to write them, I guess. 
> 
> The first is You, Me, We by HomuraRequests (HomuraBakura). It looks into his fusion with Yubel in such a more striking way than I did. It's really jarring and fantastic and definitely go read it.
> 
> The second is Reunions by ofwyrmsandguns. It's basically a retelling of that first episode of season 4, where we see Jaden's friends grieving for him, interrupted by his sudden return… and then notably don't see their reunion. It's also got more of a focus on the three transfers than his older friends and, while I always wanted to write that scene with Jesse getting his Crystal Beasts back, I think it definitely influenced me in fleshing out the part with Jim and Axel. I don't think our takes on things were too similar… but if you enjoyed what I did here, you should go read that one also.  
> Thank you for making it this far!


End file.
